Twix and Shout

Newhaven FC away to Eastbourne United in the RUR Cup Semi-Final at the Oval

The Dockers are away to the U's in the Rifles Cup at Channel View Road. It's a new era for the Dockers, so maybe Dockers 2.0. There is no pressure, just a semi-final. The other semi-final has been postponed due to a frozen pitch but we're on the posh new 3G so none of that here. The Dockers were here just 2 weeks ago and lost 4-1 so we're expecting a tough game today. There has been a huge upgrade at the Oval since we were last here a year ago. It’s taken us that long to thaw out. It was so cold. Apparently the upgrade cost £1.2 million but it is very nice. Josh Tuck is back in the starting 11 replacing Henry. It's still hard to get any real idea of the shape that the Dockers are playing. Warwick is wearing the 7 but not playing on the wing. The U's have squad numbers which is unusual at this level. Pretentious Moi? Don't think that would work with the ever revolving Dockers.

The U's are straight at the Dockers defence. We could easily have been a goal down in 30 seconds. It doesn’t go in but the Dockers remain under pressure for a while. Jake creates a chance but no-one meets his low cross. Jake is involved again after a great move down the wing but he is denied by the post. The U’s breakthrough is denied by some last ditch Dockers defending. We get a bit of excitement as we think that the Tigers keeper, James Broadbent, has handled the ball outside the box. It’s not clear cut and the ref gives him the benefit of the doubt. He is probably a big Bridget Jones fan. Or maybe it’s Paddington. The Tigers are kept at bay until 20 when a fast break ends with the ball in the Dockers net. 1-0. They are made to wait until 38 for their second goal. It’s still 2-0 at the break. The Dockers need a good second half to take it to penalties now, And we need to be thankful that the deficit is not 6 or more. It could easily be over already. Hopefully the ref will change ends at half time and we’ll get a few decisions after he’s had a quick nap and a cup of tea.

There is a substitution at the break as Kobi is replaced by Kwabs. The Dockers are putting up a better scrap this half. It's a much more even battle. The U’s no. 16 is probably the most shouty player we have ever seen. He just won’t shut up. No leadership like that in the Dockers. Tuck tries to give the ref some polite feedback, gets booked and sent to the sin bin for his troubles. But he doesn’t leave the pitch. Very odd. He is very wisely for subbed for Clarke-Salter on 64. The Dockers make some more changes to try to get back into it. Connell replaces Rohilla. Another ten minutes and Lee is replaced by Dexter-Lambert on 74. The last change is Johnson on for Ben Royall. on 81. The changes have the wrong effect as the U’s score on 85 (3-0) and 86 (4-0) to finish the Dockers off. We think we have a consolation goal scored by Warwick as his diving header puts Johnson’s cross into the net only for it to be ruled out for offside. We are hoping that the mist gets heavier so the match is abandoned but it doesn’t and it isn’t. 4-0. Bugger.

Gutted to have got so close and not make it to the final but it wasn’t close tonight. The new era starts with a battering with the 4-0 scoreline flattering the losers. It should have been more. It was an ok performance at times but the defending was dreadful. Becoming a bit of a habit! Perhaps the defence is missing the motivation of incurring the wrath of Bussy to keep them on their toes. The U’s were 10 times as vocal as the Dockers and it paid off tonight. Well organised and loads of leaders on the pitch sees the U’s through to the final. At least it wasn’t Baltic tonight as losing always makes it feel a bit colder. It’s back to league action for the stumbling Dockers. We’ll hopefully be at Saltdean on Tuesday for some more ups and downs.

POTM: Hard to pick with such a poor performance but Jake gave us hope so gets the prize 🏅.

The refereeing was not the best. Very inconsistant except when it came to giving everything to the host and nothing to the visitors.

The Scan’O’meter loved the Nachos 7/10 and the hot chocolate was great too 8/10.

Will we be at Plough Lane on Saturday, probably not after the ridiculously aggressive stewarding there last time.

Love Tranmerekat 🐾

The Oval

Cheeky Nachos

The boys

A Lard Days Night

Horsham FC away to Eastbourne United AFC in the Sussex Senior Cup Quarter Final at the Oval

The Hornets are away to the Whites in a bid to be runners up to Brighton in the Sussex Cup. (Stop that).  Brighton have been knocked out by Steyning anyway.  Up for grabs is a place in the Semi-Final against either Burgess Hill or Steyning. The Green and Yellow are 2 league above the whites but this is Cup football in proper football weather on a very cold and windy Tuesday night in East Sussex. It's +2C but the wind child is making it -6C. The shock of the night is the addition of a certain Mr. Tuck in the starting line up in his usual No.4. Thought he had a cold weather clause in his contract so he wouldn't have to play on cold winter nights😲. We recognise a few the names of the Hornets players.

The Hornets start well and are getting lots of possession. The imaginatively named Whites were struggling to get out . They were being forced to play long balls by the Green and Yellow press but the wind was blowing it back at them and the keeper couldn't kick as far as the halfway line. The visitors were wasteful with a few chances but the wind was causing them problems too and it's not the best pitch for good passing play. The waited until we were completely frozen to give us anything to celebrate on 26 ⚽ when James Hammond heads in a cross goal header. We are a bit warmer now. There are some more chances. Dougie gets into the 6 yard box (did he have a SAT NAV failure) and it's either a great low cross or he puts it wide. He gets another chance with a low volley from the edge of the box but it goes just wide. He's getting closer to the target🥅. He could still put a penalty out for a throw-in though. Eastbourne get shot on target but it's easily saved. Reece Meekums nets for the Hornets second on 43 ⚽. Two up at the break and time for the Lardy Army to change ends via the clubhouse to defrost a bit.

One change at the break and Jack Mazzone comes on up front for Horsham. We have to wait until 63 minutes ⚽for the next and important 3rd goal. It's from half time sub Mazzone, who goes on to score again ⚽after a couples of minutes. He has his hattrick inside six minutes⚽. Some substitution that. Has well and truly warmed us up. The Hornets full of confidence now but can't find a 6th. The Lardy army are is good voice too, "Start speading the lard" 🤣. The consolation goal for the Whites comes on 73 when a complete failure of communication at the back leaves the surprised striker with an empty net to tap into. The home fans finally get to warm up a bit now. A few more attempts at a 6th goal are missed and then it's time to go home and get out of the wind.

That was a great game largely because there were lots of goals to cheer and hence getting a chance to warm up celebrating. I hope the goal for the opposition came in time for their fans to hold off the frostbite setting in. The Hornets were a bit wasteful in front of goal and maybe should have scored more but 5 a was plenty to get the job done. The Whites consolation was only their 2nd shot on target so it was never really in doubt especially after the important 3rd goal went the Visitors way. It was one of the coldest we have done for a while, especially out in the wind but was well worthwhile. Need to get to a few more Horsham        games as they are good to watch.

POTM: Almost goes to Tuck but as he missed his changes it goes to Jack Mazzone who turned an ordinary game into an exciting one.  A six minute hattrick in the conditions against a good opponent was something special to watch..

There isn't much to say about the officials except to thank them for braving the freezing wind🥶. And congratulate the linespeople for not freezing solid🧊. Well done.

The Scranometer needed a couple of hot chocolates to defrost. 7/10.

See you at the Dockers next week if we ever get warm.

Love Tranmerekat 🐾

Back at the Oval

A few familiar names

Uncle Dougie

The Whites

Freezing